She Fed my Baby Soda

Dear DW,

 I’m having a problem with a woman in my church.  She really is a nice lady, but she has pushed me too far.  I have a five month old baby.  He’s my first child.  This lady must have a sixth sense because as soon as I come into the church building, there she is whisking away with my baby.   A few weeks ago, I thought I saw her feeding him ice cream.  Today, I walked around the corner and saw her letting him suck soda from a straw!!!  I am fuming mad!  She’s a sweet woman who has been somewhat of a mentor to me in the past.  I know she loves babies but recently she has just about frayed my last nerve.  I’m not sure what to do.  I’m finding myself hiding and doing everything I can to avoid her when I see her.  I don’t want to lose her friendship and, honestly, I don’t want to offend a church member.  What do I do?

 Frayed and Torn in Nevada

 

Dear Frayed and Torn- 

Since this is your first baby in ministry, I want to help you with your priorities:  Baby, #1, Church Lady #31.  You have permission to offend!  It’s ok to assert yourself where your kids are concerned.  It’s probably not going to be the last time so you might as well practice while your son is still a baby. 

 I am getting the feeling that the reason you haven’t already dealt with your angst is because this lady is not just anybody in the church.  It sounds like she has been someone special to you.  Even more important that you approach her about how you are feeling.  You don’t want to spend your time hiding in the bushes from someone you admire as a mentor.  Approach her about how you are feeling so that you can reconcile with her!  If you value her friendship, make sure that this does not become a rift between the two of you.  She may not even realize that she has crossed the boundary lines.  Might you offend a church member or friend… yes.  But your baby, your frayed nerves, and your friendship are worth the risk. 

 Avoidance is not going to make this better.  Face it head on, chin up, and ready to take a blow.  However, you may be surprised if that blow feels more like a soft apology and a hug from a friend.

 Love,

DW~                                                                                                             Matthew 5:22-24