First Interview

Dear DW, 

Any advice for a newbie going on their first interview?  I don’t know what to expect and, truthfully, I don’t understand why I am going on the interview as the spouse.  I get the point of traveling to see the area we might live in and meeting the people from the church but I’m a bit confused as to the reason I need to be in the interview meeting. 

Nervous in North Carolina

 

Dear Nervous, 

Congratulations and look out below…you are entering the adventure zone!   Yes, most churches want to meet the spouse of their ministerial candidate because they understand that the spouse can affect every aspect of the ministry that happens at their church.  They also want you to see if you can live in their community and if you will fit in with their people.  But as you climb into the interview car, I do have two pieces of advice for you: Step carefully and enjoy the ride.   

Step carefully– Be cautious of how much you interject into the conversation.  This church is interviewing your spouse, not you.  Your role should be fly-on-the-wall.  Observe everyone and take in all that your spouse will be missing as they go through the inquisition.  Be your spouse’s sixth sense.   

Also, beware of the “twofer”.  (That’s two-for-one if you don’t speak country.)  If you start hearing questions like, “Do you play an instrument?” and “Do you have any interest in ______ ministry?” you know that they have already started shopping in the BOGO section.  Make a plan with your spouse as to how this will be handled if it comes up in the interview. 

Enjoy the ride– Consider the interview as the dating portion of your relationship with this church.  You are both trying to figure out if this will be a good match.  Most churches are kind and generous when interviewing prospective pastors.  This is your opportunity to learn about them and be treated in ways that you might not experience once you are hired.  Enjoy the dinners, town tours, and gracious introductions while you are still infatuated with each other. 

Approach this interview like God has a purpose in it even if you do not end up finding your perfect match.  Pray that you and your spouse will be a blessing to these people even if it’s not the place for you.  Will something you say or do help them as they search for the right pastor?  There’s no guilt in saying “no” if you approach every interview as an opportunity for ministry…even if it’s only a one-meeting relationship.

 So don’t be Nervous.  Have fun on your first step toward the adventure zone!  Churches don’t usually bite in the interview process.  (That comes later.)  🙂

Love,

DW

 

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